Can You Believe That Sad Songs Actually Make Us Happy? See What Science Explains!

Most of us have tendency to avoid sad songs and music when we feel particularly down since we believe that it will make us feel even worse.

For most people, post-breakup behavior usually includes actually listening to a lot of sad songs whose music and lyrics speak of our woe in order to make us feel even worse and get all the sadness out as soon as possible. Yet, seems that we all had it wrong all along. Science proves the opposite is true – sad music actually makes us happier and improves our mental health. Here’s how.

Songs are sad but they bring positivity to our brain!

Similarly to the case of a musical device called appoggiatura found in a number of sad songs, such as Adele’s “Someone Like You”, there is a scientific explanation to why sad music actually makes us happy. David Huron, a professor of arts and humanities in the School of Music and the Center for Cognitive Science at the Ohio State University, has been studying the effects of sad music on people. During earlier studies, he has found that certain groups of people are more likely to listen to sad music – people with openness, experiences, and people who score high on neuroticism tests. According to Huron, the hormone prolactin is responsible for positive impact that sad music has on our feelings.

So What does sad song does to our brain?

Prolactin, mostly known as the hormone that causes lactation in breastfeeding women, is also being released during times of great grief. During great sorrow, our bodies produce the hormone as a natural soother to ease the process and help us cope easier. Similarly, as we are listening to sad songs, our body sends out a similar signal, which results in the production of prolactin. Therefore, as we listen to sad songs, we actually trick our body into creating a pleasant environment and happier feelings. “It’s as though Mother Nature has stepped in and said, ‘We don’t want the grief to get too exorbitant,'” Huron explains in an interview with The National.

So, no matter if you listen to sad music when you are feeling sad, or just because you like the feeling, now you have the scientific explanation of why you enjoy Adele’s music so much.

A list of songs You Can Listen to

1. “Since U Been Gone,” Kelly Clarkson
2. “Hello“, Adele
3. “Irreplaceable,” Beyoncé
4. “Cry Me a River,” Justin Timberlake
5. “Someone Like You,” Adele
6. “I Knew You Were Trouble,” Taylor Swift
7. “Because of you“, Kelly Clarkson
8. “The Heart Wants What It Wants” Selena Gomez
9. “A Million Reasons“, Lady Gaga
10. “Echoes of Silence,” The Weeknd

8 Habits Of People Who Look Younger Than Their Actual Age

The current culture is obsessed with how to look younger. There are anti-wrinkle cream commercials by the dozen, there are thousands of plastic surgeons who specialize in making people look younger, and of course the air-brushed celebrities only add to the obsession with looking younger. “They” say that there is no anti-wrinkle cream out there that actually works. Plastic surgery can go horribly wrong and is also very expensive. Celebrity photos are not real. We all know this, yet our culture is still obsessed with how to look younger. So, is there anything a normal person can do to make themselves appear as less than their age? The answer is yes, but you may have to go about it much differently than you think.

Here are 8 scientifically-proven ways to look younger than your actual age:

1. Age Gracefully

There’s nothing worse than the sight of someone who is desperately trying to keep looking like a teenager while everyone else can tell their real age. If you are trying to look younger, sometimes the secret is to look your age! Dressing like a teenager and wearing a ton of makeup can actually make you look older than you are. (We’ve all seen these people!) Accept who you are, age and all. Age gracefully, love yourself, and you will look younger without even trying. A study conducted in the USA confirms that people who have a positive outlook on aging live longer and look younger than people who do not age so gracefully.

2. Add Some Spice to Your Diet

Appearing younger doesn’t just have to do with appearance. Keeping your brain alert and young is also important. Researchers from Singapore discovered that people who eat curry often have better cognitive function than those who don’t. Your brain’s cognitive functioning ability is an important aspect of looking younger. You want to keep your mind sharp as well as your face and body to truly appear younger.

3. Accept Life for What it Is

Harvard University researchers have discovered that developing a thick skin towards the curve balls that life throws at you can help you to appear younger than your age. If you are not easily fazed by your circumstances, you will do well in the battle against wrinkles. To achieve this you must remember that your circumstances do not define who you are. Nothing can change who you are. Circumstances always change; nothing lasts forever. So, don’t sweat the small stuff, or even the big stuff.

4. Sing!

Your voice may not sound like an angel’s, but the effects of singing as discovered by US researchers, are too good to keep your mouth shut. They are not sure why singing keeps you younger, but whether it’s breathing better or simply the social togetherness of joining a choir, looking younger is a great side effect! Do a quick search online and find a choir in your area to join.

5. Spend Quality Time With Your Dog

Dogs give unconditional love and it is extremely hard to not love them back. The act of spending time with an animal who adores you and wants to have fun with you improves your emotional outlook on life. Research also shows that the simple act of walking your dog will boost your fitness level, increase social activity, and give your sense of well-being a boost. All of these factors play a part in making you look younger.

6. Wondering How to Look Younger? Sleep!

If you want to look younger, don’t buy into the idea that you can “sleep when you’re dead.” Sleep is so important to your body and brain functions, and sleep experts have discovered that you don’t need less sleep as you age. Apparently, you will always need as much sleep as you can get, especially if you want to look younger! Try to always get 8 hours as often as you can.

7. Get Religion

Multiple studies prove that the act of praying, going to church, and having faith can add a few years to your life. This is because things like bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness cannot be present in your heart alongside faith. Holding onto unforgiveness can even cause illness, and the people who are able to forgive appear to live longer, fuller lives. Faith brings a release of stress and worry which is good for your body and make you look younger than you are.

8. Google Can Help You Appear Younger

Researchers proved that surfing the internet regularly helps the brain to stay sharp in language, memory, and reading; all of which are important to appearing younger. So instead of “wasting time” on the internet, you can think of it as your long-term goal for anti-aging. Surf the net to your heart’s content! Just make sure you are still getting enough sleep.

What Makes Some People More Attractive To The Opposite Sex? Science Gives The Answer!

Have you ever wondered why you are attracted to a specific person or if there were certain biological features that were more important than others? Well it turns out that beauty is definitely in the eye of the beholder. In fact, there are different anthropometric traits we associate with an individual’s attractiveness. Science has uncovered distinguishing features that determine attractiveness. However, there is no need to worry if you lack these features as there are proven hacks we can use to improve our attractiveness. Let’s take a look at the scientific features that we are attracted to and what we can do to hack them.

We are unconsciously attracted to the shape of the human body.

Studies identify that men and women with symmetrical bodies have more orgasms. Science has discovered that we are attracted to the face more than any other part of the body; specifically, the symmetry of the face. A symmetrical face will be equal on both sides and demonstrates phenomenal genes. When we analyze the body of the opposite sex, we look for ideal body ratios. Men prefer a waist-to-hip ratio of 7:10. In contrast, women prefer a man with a 9:10 waist-to-hip ratio.

Let’s face it (pun intended), a youthful, proportional, and symmetrical face is ideal and attractive. There are specific exercises you can do in order to improve the symmetry of your face. These include the following: cheek toning exercise, the partial wink, and the facial stretch.

Furthermore, fix your posture. It seems as though everyone I come across has horrible posture. Here are some quick tips in fixing you posture: 1) Wear a posture belt; 2) Hold your cell phone at eyel level; 3) Use a standing workstation at the office; and 4) Simply stand up straight.

We are attracted to the voice of a person.

What type of voice are you attracted to? What if I told you that men prefer women with a high (breathy) voice? Well, we do. As women age, their voice will get lower and a high voice represents a younger woman. Whereas, a female is attracted to the voice of a man proportional to his body size – preferably a large body size that signifies a low pitch.

Fortunately, we can improve the sound of our voice. Preston Ni provides four suggestions for improving our voice: 1) Breathe right; 2) Make sounds based on diaphragmatic breathing; 3) Take a singing or acting class; and 4) Work with a private voice coach.

Our ring finger is linked to sperm count.

This one is a little shocking. Our fingers reveal a wide spectrum of information about us. John Manning writes in his intriguing book, Digit Ratio: A Pointer to Fertility, Behavior and Health, “The ratio of the length between the ring and index finger is somewhat sexually dimorphic. The fingers may provide permanent, and easily visible, historic marker of hormones, particularly testosterone.” Manning also commented on our hands and how they may infer whether we are more likely to have homosexual inclinations, if we are highly fertile or not, or even if we may eventually suffer from a heart attack. Crazy stuff!

I encourage you to check out Manning’s book, specifically the table identifying the characteristics associated with the digit ratio. You just might be able to determine if you are more aggressive, more fertile, or if you have a greater proclivity toward homosexuality just by looking at your fingers!

Long-distance runners are more attractive.

Research has uncovered that long-distance runners will have greater levels of testosterone. In fact, male long-distance runners have optimal genes. They are also in much better shape than everyone else. To rub it in even more, male long-distance runners are more likely to have raging sex drives and larger sperm counts.

Men and women who exercise are also more likely to be more intelligent. Exercise is the optimal vehicle for stimulating neurogenesis. Neurogenesis is the birth of new neurons (otherwise known as brain cells). So, get off your butt and go for a long run. This will not only make you more intelligent and fit, it will also increase your libido!

Lastly, men and women looking for the optimal partner will look for these qualities. By possessing them, you will more than likely attract a similar partner and continue to improve the gene pool. Remember, continuously improve your body, work on your voice, get in peak physical condition, and pay attention to your fingers.

8 Highly Attractive Things In Women (That Have Nothing to Do With Appearance)

I’ve been helping men improve their love lives for years now. I’ve probably read dozens of articles on what women find attractive in men. I’ve even written a few of them. The funny thing is, I rarely come across articles that touch on what men find attractive in a woman. Is the modern dating game so lopsided that it’s enough for a woman to just ‘show up’, or do we men stumble merely at the sight of a nice head of hair and a shapely body?

I won’t deny the fact that this is true for a lot of men out there, but there’s a little more needed to really attract a man who isn’t impressed with mere ‘good looks’?

Now, I can’t speak for the entire population here, but here are eight things that I, personally, find incredibly attractive in a woman.

1. Kindness

This might sound like a bit of a cliché, but true kindness really is rare these days. Sure, you get people who are nice to those who hold some sort of value to them, but how many people do you meet every day that would go and talk to the lone stranger crying in the subway? I don’t want to be with a person that’s just nice to me, my friends, and my family. I want a person who can brighten up my day by brightening up the lives of everyone she comes in contact with.

You have a power to lighten someone’s day just by smiling to them. It’s worth using it often, also to become more attractive in men’s eyes. Studies from the University of British Columbia show that men are attracted to smiling women. A natural smile conveys messages like optimism and stability, which are definitely qualities desired in a mate.

2. Positivity and sense of humor

“It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.”

One of the most important things in any relationship, romantic or otherwise, is the ability to have a great time and have a good laugh. Taking care of your emotional hygiene and good mood should be your priority. Only then you can take life positive, light, and with a fair dose of humor. While I never hold any significant other to a comic standard of say, Ellen Degeneres, I do love a woman who can live life one day at a time, take a joke, and crack a few of her own.

3. Passion

This might sound like a tall ask to some, but I’m a person who needs to be inspired constantly to be happy. To me, there’s no feeling in this world as attractive as being inspired by a woman who’s passionate about her pursuits in life.

You could be a world class pianist or you could be doctor, the minute I see your eyes light up while talking about what you want to achieve in life, I guarantee you I’ll be falling hard and fast. You cannot get bored together, because there is always a topic to talk about with a girl who is passionate about something.

4. Getting along with my friends

A friend once told me an old Chinese saying of a man that has a wife who gets along with his friends will have a long and pleasant life. Well, I have a feeling that my friend might be lying about there being an actual saying; however, I have to say that it really is a beautiful thing to be with a woman who can get along with your buddies and just be ‘one of the guys’ when she wants to.

5. Confidence

“Nothing is more beautiful than a confident woman who doesn’t pretend to be someone she’s not.”

I don’t know about you, but I like being around people who are happy to be themselves. You see, it’s not just women who respond powerfully to a confident partner, I love being with a woman who stands up for herself and what she believes in; as long as it’s not an opinion against my sports team or favorite band. Ha! Just kidding. I would never date a girl who didn’t love Iron Maiden.

6. Being comfortable with her sexuality

There’s a lot to be said on what’s sexy and, more specifically, on what makes a woman sexy. To me, what matters is not what a girl wears beneath the sheets or what she’s into, it’s the fact that she’s comfortable with her own sexuality and aware of her sexual energy. Romance is just so much more fun with a woman who knows what she’s into and isn’t abashed about it.

Your sexuality is a big part of your human nature. The sooner you embrace this side, the better and more attractive partner you become.

7. Decisiveness

“A girl should be two things: who & what she wants.”

One of my biggest pet peeves is people who don’t know what they want and can’t take responsibility for their own decisions. At the end of the day, I’m willing to battle through a few arguments on where we should have dinner or which movie we should watch, as long as I know that I’m with a person who’s strong enough to be decisive.

8. She has her own sense of style

Here’s the thing: we men are very much visual creatures. It’s just how we’re evolutionary programmed. Something that I absolutely love in a woman is a unique sense of style. I’ll admit that I tend to gravitate towards certain stereotypes – bohemian Goth with a fair share of body ink (in case you’re wondering). I fall in love whenever I see a woman who has a sense of style that I don’t get to see on every street corner.

4 Ways Long Distance Relationships Can Survive

Long distance relationships can prove to be a challenge. In this millennial world, we are all connected by technology hence distance seems a mere absence of physical contact. Over the years, long distance relationships have become the tradition and the challenge many couples have to go through. In the midst of opportunities and financial necessities, relationships often struggle to overcome the distance factor.

However, how can one recreate the intimacy while being miles apart? How do you create the exclusivity while being so far apart? How do you create the trust and confidence towards your relationship?

I found my answers after having experienced the Long Distance Relationship. After being part of the struggles and turmoils whilst finding support from similar couples who share my experience .

So how do we all do it ?

1. Focus On Yourself First

In order to be happy and confident in your relationship, you need to be able to embrace yourself first. Through thick and thin you need to be able to love yourself. Your love is then shared with your partner, with pure trust and confidence. Sometimes we jump into relationships as a form of deep and rooted emotional support which eventually causes you to have an extremely high expectation whilst your partner feels he’s put in a pressure cooker.

This can be detrimental for yourself as well as your relationship. Never carry your baggage around and dump it on your partner, instead make peace with it and share it with them. Understanding is the key for an outstanding relationship hence sharing is the key. In order to reach such a mutual understanding, you would need to understand yourself first.

Take time for yourself and indulge in activities that can challenge your emotional boundaries. Once you’ve made peace with yourself, you would find being in a long distance relationship as part of your life instead of a huge burden.

2. Focus On Communication And Sharing Together

Communication is vital for any relationship especially if you’re miles apart. It’s what guarantees your relationship lasting, reduces anxieties and creates trust. Personally, I’ve had problems giving my full trust to someone. Often times, it impacts the one I care about the most . Eventually, I understood myself and eradicated the cause. I gave a chance to trust. However, this wouldn’t have been possible if the effort of communication wasn’t made.

Sometimes I get these questions, ” My boyfriend doesn’t text me much , what do I do ? The key is to find a balance, create a routine and schedule your time spent together. Share with them videos, stories or anything that reminds you of them. Allow them to have a sneak peak to your world even if they aren’t accustomed to doing the same. Sometimes some people are too much into social media, so don’t get offended.

As long as you have a mutual understanding on how your communication should be, you’ll be able to cruise along the distance easily,

3. Create Memories Together

Memory is an amazing timeline to look back. Flashbacks are wonderful and ensure the life of the whole relationship . Remembering laughter , stress, and even tears can bring couples together. When staying apart in a long distance relationship, memories are an important element to keep your relationship progressing and keeping it special .

One way to create such memories is to travel the world together. One of my personal favorite locations would be the Canary Islands. It’s not only secluded but it also encompasses the elements of nature. It’s a place where you can not only get to know your partner but you can also enjoy the adventure of being there. Relax and enjoy the fine dining experiences and create the intimacy which has been non-existent due to the distance.

You can also travel to places that would challenge your minds such as India and Philippines. You are definitely in for a challenge both with the food as well as language. This will test your relationship boundaries and understanding in your relationship. Why not try it?

4. Schedule Your Next Visit

Organization and scheduling are important if you and your partner are at opposite ends of the world. You need to have a certain timeline of spending time with each other while maintaining your real life. Having a concrete plan also allows you to be financially stable and gives you the anticipation to be reunited once again.

A couple I knew, a Vietnamese woman and a Brazilian man, fell in love in Russia and constantly shuffled countries to be close to each other. Despite the turmoil, they constantly scheduled their next visit sometimes a few months prior. This allowed them to have a form of anticipation and excitement .

Over time, this visits and travel created a story that’s unique to them and developed a sense of trust and commitment. Your relationship should be an unknown love story and perfect organization can guarantee that.

In Conclusion

Having a long distance relationship can be a challenging adventure. However, the best of gems is found on rough rocks. Once you reach your final destination you will find all of this ultimately worth it .

Happiness Isn’t About How Much You Have, But How Much You Enjoy Life

Many of us believe that the more we have, the happier we are. But is it really the truth?

As economy develops, we seems to be able to live a better life. Earning money to buy the things that we desire, that’s how it goes. But do these material possessions always guarantee long-lasting happiness?

There might be a time that you have been saving money to buy yourself something, like a new gadget, a luxury car, or a grand apartment. Yes, you might be uplifted at the moment but the delight never lasts. The happiness recedes after a day, a week, a month, a year, or a decade. The new gadget will become old, the luxury car will depreciate, the grand apartment will become boring.

The truth is that although we have much more than the previous generations do, we are not happy as we are supposed to be.

Probably we have fallen into traps which keep us away from the long-lasting happiness that we have been chasing for throughout our lives. Check if you have fallen into one of these 3 traps and try to get rid of them:

We play hard but become slaves of desires

There is a kind of people who always play hard and sometimes we call them the hedonist. The hedonists always strive to maximize pleasure and hunt for excitement to satisfy their desires without realizing the negative side of their behaviors. They only look for pleasure and try to escape from pain. It is not uncommon that they would gradually become the slaves of desires with only vanity left after the excitement fades away.

We work hard but suffer from the pain

The busy bee is the exact opposite of the hedonist. They work hard in exchange for more material possessions. They look for the pleasure that comes in the future but suffer from the present pain. They do not realize that they are just running on a treadmill, running hard but only marking time. Ironically, the material possessions that they work hard for can only give them temporary happiness.

We do nothing hard but lose the passion of life and the hope of future

Then, you might think that it is better not to play hard or work hard. However, being a nihilist can neither guarantee you long-lasting happiness. Being a nihilist is the worst case because the nihilists believe that life is meaningless. They do not enjoy what they have got at the moment, nor do they have any hope for the future. Without passion and hope, one can hardly have feel any kind of happiness.

We spend years living our lives on this planet and it would be a pity if we cannot get a taste of what it is like to be truly happy. Easy come, easy go. The long-lasting happiness that keeps us living our lives passionately is something that worth us spending time to build. There is something we can do to pursue the happiness that lasts a lifetime.

1. Capture and collect positive emotions

To put it simply, the more positive emotions you capture in a day, the more likely your happiness sustains.

Positive emotions are not limited to joy and excitement. Psychologists say that positive emotions also include joy, gratitude, serenity, interest, hope, pride, amusement, inspiration, awe, and love.  These positive emotions can broaden and build our long-lasting psychological, intellectual, physical and social resources which increase our well-beings.

Try to capture and collect your positive emotions every day. Keep a diary or take some photos. Instead of recording what happens, describe how you feel is rather more important. This will build your psychological resource and one day it will remind you what kinds of positive emotions you have experienced.

2. Engage with what you do

Wanderers with no goals often feel unhappy. They disconnect with the world and tend to be over-absorbed in their emotions or abstract, unexplainable thoughts. They are on a road to nowhere.

But instead, if we are more present in our lives and feel engaged with whatever we do or say, we can feel more grounded and happier. Being engaged prevents your mind from wandering and stops you from overthinking too much. On the other hand, when you are engaged in something, maybe your job or your hobby, you work for improvement and accomplishment. The pleasure of eventually achieving something gives you the feeling of pride and also makes whatever you are doing meaningful.

3. Derive meaning from everything you do

If we can’t find any meaning in what we do, we tend to have a sense of loss, thinking that we have wasted our time and energy. It is just like the nihilists who think life is meaningless and a waste of time.

Frankly, there are some times that we really find something meaningless. Those things that are supposed to disappoint or frustrate us are exactly what keep us from the long-lasting happiness. Try to derive meaning from them and think in the other way round. Losing a competition might be a chance for you to realize your room for improvement; failing in a interview might be a chance for you to look for a better opportunity.

4. Build in-depth relationships with others

We always need some kinds of connections with people, friends, families, and lovers. But what makes us feel satisfied from relationships is not the quantity but the quality.

Some might be satisfied with the fame but it is only the vanity. An in-depth relationship is a totally different story. It allows you to open up your mind fearlessly. You can have deep chats with your friends, hearing their stories and telling yours. You do not only gain practical support but also emotional supports from them. There is nothing better than being deeply known by someone who knows you better than yourself and speaks your mind.

5. Broaden your definitions of success

Success is not only about winning a game or trumping others. It can mean completing things you want to do or should do. It can be small or big, which does not really matter. It can be as simple as finishing a small task on your work. Sometimes people judge and they define the meaning of success as numbers. But bear in mind that you are the only one who can define your success.

And by celebrating your accomplishments, even the smallest ones, every day can make you happier. Just because of finishing a small task on your work, you can celebrate it by giving yourself a little treat. It is the mark showing that you are capable of achieving something and giving you a sense of pride.

Be happy and shine like a diamond

Happiness is sometimes a very abstract idea and we might be lost on the road to the long-lasting happiness. The pursuit of happiness is a lifelong lesson that we all have to take. But once you and I get the clues, we will all shine like a diamond, with an everlasting shiny light that everyone would admire.